Ex Pat Mamma

Tuesday, February 08, 2005


One of my dear friends send me an email today telling me she bet I looked "elegant." This would be a friend in Canada who hasn't seen me for over a year. So, to set the record straight, I definitely do not look elegant - at least not in motion.
Standing still, there's a possibility that in the right light and in my one nice long maternity dress that I might pull off something close to elegance. I've gained 3 kilos so far (though it varies depending on the time of day, strangely enough) but there isn't any fat: just a big football belly and some seriously porn-star-esque boobs. Not that I am trying to suggest it is sexy: it isn't. But in truth, I find my new figure quite beautiful.
Elegance, however, is another thing. Elegance requires being able to move in an elegant manner. No chance. 4 months gone and already doing the pregnancy duck waddle. It's just impossible not to: my back must have changed shape, things are moving about in the middle, and I have to lean back to balance the belly. And the belly is only 3 kg bigger so far, so I can't imagine how I will be moving by July! Bending over is a challenge, not because I am particularly enormous, but because what belly there is, is rock solid. It is not like being a bit chubby, because fat folds and bends. Pregnant bellies move for no man (woman or child) and you have to reach around them. Trying to get the hiking boots on in the snow is already proving enough of an effort to leave me out of breath. Dropping something and having to pick it up - especially from a sitting position - consumes enough calories in my quick estimation to constitute at least 100g of milk chocolate. Oops, just dropped a pencil - better go to the canteen :)



  • At 8:38 PM, Blogger S.A.H.M. said…

    Yes, the rock solid football belly - I had forgotten that one! Wait 'til you have rock solid belly with obvious elbow/knee bulges petruding from inside! The duck-waddle is most becoming and I know I invested in some slip-on shoes/sandles come spring because laces became a bugger. Still, perhaps another chore DH could add to his (no doubt) growing list!!! :)

  • At 10:36 AM, Blogger ex_pat said…

    I've already got my velcro pradas for "summer" - but it could still be snowing in May, so I'm stuck with the hiking boots (lace ups) for a few months yet. Going for the zippy knee highs if there is any sign of a snow free day :)


Post a Comment

<< Home